Coming To

Life is full of surprises. No matter what you have planned, how you feel at any given moment, or how you're attitude may be towards a certain someone, something, or idea, everything can change in a matter of seconds. This past year has been some of the most tumultuous lonely, stressful, and anxious months of my life. There were times where i would think to myself, "if i could only go back i would change everything." But within the last few weeks, few days even, I have finally realized that everything I have gone through and everything I continue to go through is shaping me into a better and stronger person. I never granted or praised myself with much worth, but recently I have begun to realize that I am a good person. I am worth it. I am lucky and even though I am as depressed and as lonley as ever, I am still better off than most people out there. I am stronger than I think. I am capable of doing anything I want. But in order to do so, I need to stop wasting my time trying to please people that couldn't care less what I say or do, and focus on those who really do care for me and love me.
Late last night and early this morning, I had a great talk with a great girl who I would have never expected would reach out and talk to me. She really got me thinking and made me feel a lot better about everything and I can't than her enough.
I am now ready to let go of my past. I am ready to move on and be happy. I am ready to focus on the important things in life. I am ready to get my life back together and push on to the next chapter, whatever it may be. I am ready.